Lost in translation

One of my all-time favorite movies is Andaaz Apna Apna. I always crack up with laughter every time I see the same scenes - whether it's Teja removing his suspenders or handling Vasco da Gama's gun! I am known among my friends to be constantly uttering the dialogues of the movie, and I was wondering if they would have the same kind of "punch" and impact if delivered in English. So sample some of these and relive the memorable scenes...

I am Teja because my name is Teja.

How can a rat's snores spoil a lion's sleep?

His death is also written in my hands.

The hair is cut and you don't even know it!

It came in the hand, but didn't reach the mouth.

You're a damn old sinner, you.

These two are third-number goons.

Two friends always drink in a single cup - this increases the friendship.

What are you two beasts doing in the jungle?

They don't have knowledge worth ten paise, but wear suits worth ten thousand!

What is this namaste namaste? Have you come to a damn party?

I am now going to do what I was born for.

I'll pierce the needle inside one ear and get it out of the other, and make a kalabattu out of you!

I'll remove your eyes and play marbles with them.



This, however, is simply untranslatable: Aaya hoon, kuch to chura le jaoonga!